JD's Musings Decomplexified

This also happened on yuletide of 2006. Check out that blog. It's starting to be a tradition for me that every time the year ends, I turn into a complete couch potato. I'd spend too much time sitting watching television, finishing a stack of DVDs I rented, bought, or borrowed. My reason last year was because it's a chance for me to catch up on TV shows I missed because I was viciously busy in school works. This time, my reason is akin. Work grabbed hold of my time and is gradually extinguishing my social life. Graveyard shift snatched me from theaters and I'm so ready-to-drop at daytime that I could not finish even a thirty-minute TV show. Dead beat.

Good thing SM Fairview is having an after-Christmas sale. I dropped by last Saturday on my way home to buy original DVDs at reduced prices. Then when I got off the bus, I reluctantly purchased a disk from Jack Sparrow. Take note: I said 'reluctantly'. (grin*) Won't do that again.

At home, nobody's awake between midnight and sunrise, except me. That's when I'd play my films. Can't do anything about it. My body clock has already adapted to US time since I'm working for an American company. Even during weekend break or time off, I'm dead to the world at around 5 PM and I get up at 1 in the morning! Yeah, call me anything you want but I swear I don't suck the blood of living people.

So anyway, try to guess the titles of the movies I've watched in the last 2 days. I've met Beatrix Kiddo, O-Ren Ishii, best friends Shannon & Frances, Aeon Flux (oh, that's a give-away!), Sithandra, Violet (the Hemophage who reminded me of my dreadful bangs in third year college), Alice, Jill Valentine (tukayo!), Catherine, and a lot more. I still have 6 movies left unwatched. Will deal with it later.

Grabe. 'Twas girl power at its best! These movies have awaken the feminist in me. Haha. Joke. I don't know why I bought these copies anyway. It seems like all of them featured one or more femme fatales. Maybe when I was picking up titles, I was subconsciously looking for something that would recreate my childhood dream to become an undercover Intelligence operative. But on second thought, nah... Maybe at the back of my mind, I just wanted to watch independent women in action to give me a greater sense of confidence fit for a feme sole. Heh heh.

Bloody. Horrible. Totally unacceptable. Most of the fight scenes are gory. Eeeewness talaga. Take for instance Kill Bill (1&2). I grabbed these copies because one of my friends in ES, this guy who really has a thing for brutality (hehe), said maganda raw yung movie. Hay. I should have known. I thought I've seen bloodshed in The Godfather series. But Kill Bill just wiped out my eyes' innocence on savagery! Argh. How could one woman massacre all Crazy 88, chop off both arms of that lady lawyer (Julie Dreyfus?), and slice Lucy Liu's head?! Waaah. And that's just like 1% of all the eye-popping scenes I saw in 2 days. Di muna ako kakain ng spaghetti at corned beef!!!

Maganda naman yung Kill Bill, in fairness. I just don't agree on the idea of revenge. It destroys a person's good foundation and, worse, his future. Here you're like questioning God's power in handling things and you're just prolonging the hatred in your heart. How could one mature that way? Sa totoong buhay, we should learn how to let go. It might not be easy, especially pag sobrang nasaktan tayo, but we can start the healing process by humbly asking God to heal us and take control of our lives. This is like admitting that we ARE hurt, something has been damaged and we CANNOT repair it, and we CANNOT get rid of the growing hatred in us. By coming to the Lord, we confess that we are WEAK and we acknowledge His power to heal us. A sincere prayer is the first dose to a sure recovery, not revenge.

May quote akong nakuha sa movie. Sabi ni Bill, "Some things, once you do, they can never be undone." Worth pondering over.

Question: Totoo kaya yung five-point palm exploding heart technique? Uma Thurman used that once in the film. Hehe. Just curious.

Dumaan ako saglit sa SM kanina and I saw Tina, one of my team mates. I was blind (read: had my shades on) kaya she had to stop me in my track pa para makita ko sha. Hehe. I use sunglasses talaga to reduce glare. I don't take 'em off even inside malls kasi sumasakit ulo at mata ko, so I keep them kahit pa padilimin nito ang paligid ko. BTW, she was with her boyfriend. (Calling out to Tina: Hello gurlness! Nice to see you there!)

Today's December 31, 2007. Media noche tonight. Wow. HAPPY NEW YEAR Peeps!

Roger and out.

Ok. First of all, I feel good now. To tell you the truth, I still am not that "well", but I'm getting there... WE talked. I'm back to having quiet times regularly (before sleeping in the afternoon). I read the Word again (after quite some time), or at least I read spiritual books because I don't know where to start again in the Bible. I almost finished reading It before. Sigh. Now I'm like indecisive on what book or chapter to read. Maybe later when I get home, I'll read Matthew. I was gobsmacked when the fact finally sank in that I'll be representing Him in Myanmar next year. That is a total breakthrough for me. I'm so blessed to be given this opportunity to join the Myanmar team. As in... WOW. This is one of my prayers in college, but strangely it came during this time that I'm like hidden in the shadows. Truly, His thoughts are not my thoughts and His plans are unknown till the "fullness of time". It's really lovely to think that I am about to be "launched" in the ministry of short-term missions and God will use me to reach out to the people of Myanmar. I owe it to Him that I'll really prepare my heart and body for this mission. To my surprise, it turns out that you don't need to be a Pastor or a fulltime church worker to carry out God's plans like this one. You see, if you are crying out for God to lead your life and use you in His works, He will definitely respond and bless you with opportunities to serve Him. That's how great our Lord Is.

And as I end this post, I feel much better.

Despite my negative feeling... I'll tell ya the news.

Finally. I bought a brand new Nokia N73 Music Edition last Thursday (November 29) at SM Fairview. It's beautiful, a bit complicated, powerful and it's black. Exactly what I want in a phone.

Right now, at 1:40 in the not-quite morning, I realized that I'm a bit indifferent... I have no interest in anything. It's like I don't wanna talk to anyone. I don't wanna agree on something or share my opinion. I just want to be left alone, finish my tasks, explore the gizmo (which nearly drained my savings), maybe listen to Gothic music, and then sleep. I feel tired, but not physically. I look like sleepy, but I'm not. Drained. I'm both emotionally and literally cold.

And I know why.

Maybe I should have a much longer quiet time when I get home... Been a long time since I last talked to Him for more than 15 minutes. For the past few days, I'm always in a hurry... to sleep.

We will surely talk.

Haha. I just found out something... and this is soooo amazing. Wala akong magawa sa computer kanina so I pulled up Google and typed my name in the search field. Results were shown, then I saw my name as the title of one of Spongecola's songs. Tapos I looked for the lyrics... and voila! Haha. Meron ngang kanta entitled "Jillian". Siguro Yael composed it for me... Haha. Dream on.

Here's the lyrics. Enjoy!


Jillian by Spongecola

I can’t explain this
It’s hard to understand
I try but I’m lost
Mesmerized by her
That look will surely stay
She smiles at every face, even mine

But, why doesn’t she see me in this empty room?
Does she think about you when you do, when you do?

I try to walk that same hill next to you
I try to be that missing part of you

I tremble as I wait
In these busy, city fields
I see a million stares at me

Anxiously looking
Finding the right time to see
If that sign you’re looking for, will lead to me

But, don’t you see what you’re doing to me?
Can’t you see that I’ve been dealt by this, dealt by you?

I guess I’ll always do

I try to shut them
Blurring this picture from my head
But even in the dark, you are there

I TRY TO LOVE YOU EVEN IF YOU WON’T!



I'll grab a copy of this song... as soon as possible. Wink*

Second day of our one-week QuickBooks Enterprise Training. OK naman yung 1st day namin kahapon. Our trainer's name is Caloy. During the class, nagchaChat kami nung wavemates ko who have been transferred to Shaw. Nakaka-miss sila... =( Anyway, I've come to like my classmates na rin. Yung iba nga sa kanila tenured agents na. Others came from DTT Shaw. Some came from Core. Imagine? As in tatlo lang kaming probie sa class. Somehow, it gave me a good feeling... Iniisip ko na lang, not everyone can go to Enterprise even if they want to or anytime they want to. Kasi, performance ang basis kung kukunin ka sa ES or not. Blessed me, my metrics and score card show good numbers. I was in Quartile 1 when TQ ended. Yun yung highest group/rank. So that made me qualified to join the ES tech support department. Sigh. But anyway, I thank God for that.

So then, balik ako ngayon sa 31st floor. (I can't help but remember my tech PET days.) Though I get overwhelmed sometimes sa mga tinuturo sa'min (more complicated than what was taught in QB Pro/Premier tech), I feel good about it naman. I enjoy gaining more knowledge about the accounting software. I've handled Pro/Premier before in TQ-Core but I guess ES is more challenging since customers, who each has 15 to 50 computers, call our department with their simple to difficult to head-banging questions or issues. Hardcore, ayt? Yeah. I munched on the idea that if tenured ES agents can solve problems, why not me? As long as I will exert more effort to learn.

So then... Tanggap ko na, peeps. Now I can proudly say...

I AM A TECHNICAL SUPPORT ENGINEER FOR QB ENTERPRISE!

Muhaha!

November 23, 2007. Second and last week ng Reg Q training. After ng shift... around 1:15 siguro.

Chad (Trainer) wanted to talk to me, Paw and Jerry. So pumunta kami sa 20th floor. Since Thanksgiving day sa US, holiday din sa floor. So walang tao. Solo namin yung place. Pinakamalapit na nilalang ay si kuya guard na nagbabantay sa glass doors. Aba, at nagsa-soundtrip si kuya. Sad songs ang nasa ere. Hay. Chad got a workstation and opened an email... After checking this particular mail, he then looked at us, and said...

"Guys, they want you in Enterprise."

Nanay is in town! Yay! (FYI: She's my grandmother.) Nasa house sha ngayon. Bro and I were going to SM Fairview to buy his book and check out some mobile phone models and prices (since I'm planning to buy a new unit nga next week)... Niyaya ko si Nanay na sumama sa'min. Pumayag sha. So ayun.. nag-stroll kami sa SM at kumain. And for the very first time ako ang in-charge sa fare, purchases and bill. Yahers! Haha. Sarap ng may work.

Last Monday naman, Ate Bless and I spent a couple of hours in Robinsons MetroEast. Aalis na kasi sha papuntang New York come November 22. Nakakalungkot nga eh. Huhu. So ayun, we ate lunch together sa Pancake House. Nakakaloka dahil yung first two choices ko ng food ay "not available". Pambihira. Then when I ordered another one from the menu, sabi ni Ate Bless "wala ulit". Hahaha. I was expecting that response from the waiter nga eh, pero this time meron na yon. I insisted na ako na lang ang i-charge sa bill kahit ayaw sana ni Ate Bless. Sabi ko na lang sa kanya, bigyan nya na lang ako ng maraming chocolates if ever bumalik sya, which is within 6 months from now if di pa na-process yung immigrant visa nya. Pag nakuha nya na yon, huhu, matatagalan sha sa US, not just only 6 months. Huhu. So going back, nagkwentuhan kami at plinano ang nursing career ko. Hehe. Grabe, I very much appreciate Ate Bless. (Godspeed dear friend! Thanks for the advice! Text text na lang ulit pagdating mo dun! I'll miss you. Muah*)

Ganito kasi yon... Isang linggo...

Jerry and I went to Jen's apartment. Not that I'm a detail freak but Ima tell you na rin, Jen's apartment building is pink. Cute noh? Nasa fifth floor ang room ni Jen. Nakakatuwa kasi yung kapitbahay nila, maraming tanim na halaman. Pero walang garden. Hekhek. Bale nakatanim bawat plant sa bottle ng C2. Hekhek. At lahat ng bottles, kulay yellow. As in yung yellow bottles ng C2 lang ang ginagamit nila. And, hmm, if memory serves me right, mga 20 to 25 bottled plants ang nasa harap nung apartment. Hekhek. Hekhekhek. Nakakatuwa. So going back to my tokwa't baboy & sisig story, yun ang inulam namin sa house nila Jen. Binili yun ni Jen sa Rufo's. Di nga nya kami pinagbayad ni Jerry eh.. OK lang daw kc nakuha nya naman yung bonus nya. So ayun. Voosog.

Tapos...

One evening (same week), hinatid ako nila Ianne and Charles sa Eastwood. Before ng shift ko, kumain kami sa Somethin' Fishy. Shempre, dahil parang di makapag-decide yung dalawa kung anong kakainin nila, ako na ang umorder. Di ko alam kung ano ang sumanib sa'kin... Ang inorder kong ulam namin? Tokwa't baboy at sisig. Hahaha. Tapos nun, inorder din namin yung "drink of the month" kaya may one free donkey stuffed toy kami. Shempre sa'kin napunta yon. Muhaha. Pink ang pinili ko. I named it "Doc"... initials ng surnames naming tatlo yon. Cute noh? Heehee.

Tapos...

Nung umuwi nako sa Bulacan ng Saturday... Natawa talaga ako nang malaman ko ang ulam namin. Janjararan! Tokwa't baboy.

"The marvels of daily life are exciting; no movie director can arrange the unexpected."

Kinatamaran ko na kasi ang paggawa ng blog... kaya eto, ngayon lang ulit ako nag-post. Hay. Kumusta naman ako? Well, marami na rin ang nangyari... Basahin nyo ang kwento ng isang tamad na blogger...

One day, after the shift, nag-DOTA ako sa Station 168 sa Eastwood. I was with Krissy, Xavier, Aki, Nilson, CK, and other new guys I met in TQ. Ayun, since I used to play by myself lang, talagang nangangapa pa ako pag sa LAN ako naglalaro. Iba talaga pag player-controlled na ang kalaban mo, unlike A.I. Grabe, para lang akong creeps sa laro namin. I was killed many times! At ilang beses lang akong naka-kill? ISANG beses lang! Hahaha. Pero ang sarap ng kill ko kc hero ni Aki ang pinatay ko. Hahahaha!! (Godlike ka pa ha! Bleh.) We finished THREE games! And I had to pay for almost 170 bucks after that. Imagine? Hehe. Addict. I can't believe I'm spending that much for a computer game now... And mostly guys ang kasama ko, 'coz sa team namin, si Krissy lang ang girl na marunong maglaro ng DOTA..) Tsk.

TQ Week Four: Guess what? Nag-top ako sa team namin. Hehehe. I got the lowest average handle time (AHT) that week. Hooray!

One night, hinatid ako ni Charles sa Eastwood. Before ng shift ko, tumambay muna kami sa plaza. Bought drinks in Seattle's Best and watched The Bloomfields concert. Pinaakyat ko nga rin sha sa 20th floor ng Cyberone (where I work). Hehe. Wala lang. Hmm. Ayun.

Last November 1, I went to the cemetery. Ayun, na-ASA nanaman ako. (FYI: Annual Sadness Attack). I get that emotion every November 1 so I named it ASA. Nagiging super emo talaga ako pag nakikita ko yung burial ground ni Papa. I do pray for his soul. Kinakausap ko nga rin si Papa sa isip ko. Sabi ko nga sa kanya nung nasa cemetery ako "Pa, graduate na nga pala ako... Nakapasa rin ako sa board exam. Tapos, Pa, may work na rin ako ngayon. Sa callcenter nga lang, di pa sa hospital.. Gusto ko lang kasi i-try before ko simulan yung career path ko as a nurse..." It went like that. Parang nag-report ako sa kanya. Sigh. While I was talking to him in my mind, nararamdaman ko na naiiyak na'ko. Anyway, I feel so blessed pa rin. This year nga, maikli lang ang prayer ko sa cemetery. I told God: "Thank You for being in control...". That's all. But I know He understood what I mean. Though it was short this time, nakapaloob na lahat ng gusto kong sabihin kay Lord dun.

Our seven-week assignment in TQ has just ended. I got seven VOCs (survey from my customers). 100% lahat, including satisfaction and resolution. Thank God. (Yay.) ... I'm gonna miss our SME and the QuickBooks Tech Core. Sniff*

Hmmm... ano pa bang pwede kong ikwento? Ah, meron pa nga pala... Pero sa next blog na lang. Stay tuned.

I haven't posted in about two weeks. (Sorry, Maf, I've just been so busy.)

It's 12 midnight. I'm at the 31st floor pantry. Papauwi na? No. I just got here. Starting today, our shift starts at 3 AM. Wala pa'kong tulog!!! Huhu. But that's not new to me so malamang wala ring maaawa sa'kin. Sigh* Anyway, last Saturday, nag-attend ako ng LG namin sa New Manila. Grabe. Refreshing. It's been months (months!) since I last joined our group meeting. Nakakatuwa. Kahit wala pa'kong tulog non, pumunta ako and I am so sure that it was God Who gave me strength and extra-alertness to go to the center in spite of my kaantukan blues. Haay.. I love the Lord so much! As that song goes, "my soul finds rest in You alone."

Till then. Same time. Same channel. Ta ta.

Sigh* Almost 30 hours na'kong gising.. I don't know how I do that but thank God I am able to. Yesterday, I woke up at 2pm. Left Bulacan at 4:30pm. Went to Marikina to get my oath-taking form, arrived there at 6:30pm. Dropped by Estee's place at around 7:30pm, left her OT ticket with the lobby guard. Then work shift from 9pm to 6am. Left Libis at 6:30am. Arrived in Bulacan at around 9am. Twas raining. Left with mom at 11am to go to Araneta Coliseum. Arrived at the Big Dome near 1:30pm. nag-oath taking ako, which is, by the way, so so great. Loved the feeling of being officially called a Registered Nurse. But while the second guest speaker was delivering her speech... I dozed off. Yeah. Haha. Grabe na talaga yung antok ko nun. Then around 4:30pm, tinext ko si mama (nasa guests' area sha).. sabi ko wag na namin tapusin yung program. So lumabas na kami. Pumunta kami sa Gateway, nagbihis ako (transformation: nurse's gala to dress-down porma of an eTel TSR). Then kumain kami, tapos gala ng konti sa mall, tapos umuwi na si mama.. Gusto nya na ngang umuwi na lang ako, wag na'ko pumasok sa work kasi wala pa'kong tulog, pero sabi ko sa kanya pinayagan naman ako ni TL Peaches na matulog sa lounge til 1am..

So there. Ang hebigat na kasaysayan ng puyat ko. Anong oras na ngayon? 6:05 pm. Nasa Netopia ako, killing time. Punta na'ko sa Libis maya-maya.. Kung ako lang, kanina pa sana ako dumirecho sa Libis para matulog na, pero naisip ko wala pa si Krissy dun. Sha pa naman ang magdadala ng blanket ko. So here I am... pumapatay ng oras sa Cubao. Pambihira.

Refresh nyo yung webpage para mag-change yung slogan.

Here's a very serious life lesson that I painfully learned. Take note of this so you won't suffer big deal..

Lesson: Okay lang kumain ng kumain... during breaks or even while the class is on going. You can chew, chew, and chew the whole day. Basta may money ka at kaya pa ng tummy mo. BUT, here's the thing, don't ever EVER eat carioca as your finale at the end of the day. Result? Lockjaw.

Ako ay narito ngayon sa ika-dalawampu't siyam na palapag ng megadaigdig, tumitipa ng kibord habang sila Aki at Rina ay naglalaro ng pusbola, at si Bleng at Krissy ay naglilibot sa malawak na sapot ng mundo tulad ko. Sa aking pagninilay-nilay kanina, naisip ko ang isa sa mga salitang madalas kong binibigkas sa tuwing ako ay nagugulat o nabibigo. Ito ay ang salitang "shemay". Ako ay nagugulumihanan sa kasaysayan ng salitang ito sa buhay ko. Hindi maarok ng aking isipan kung kailan at saan ko unang binigkas ito. Ang "shemay" ba ay inimbento ko lang o narinig ko ito sa ibang tao? Ngunit kung akin pang susuriin ang mga bagay-bagay, uubusin lang nito ang oras ko. Hindi naman masyadong mahalaga na malaman ko ang kasaysayan ng "shemay". Maaaring nagmula ito sa "shame" na madalas ko ring binibigkas. Maaaring mula rin ito sa "siomai" at "shoot". Haay. Makaalis na nga..

My life's events for the past five days (not in in order whatsoevah):

- I played DOTA with a friend for the first time. Yes, first time, coz til then I only played as a single-user (at home with our PC). Used to be a DOTA loner. Now I'm not. Heh heh. Played it from 11:00 PM of Thurs to 3:00 AM of Fri. Loved it. Lina Inverse is great. Just have to practice my G's and D's coz I tend to panic when a hero attacks me and my hand gets all crazy on the keyboard. Haha.

- I learned how to drive a scooter/motorbike. Planning to apply for a driver's license (student's) before the month ends. Asked Jerry to teach me how to drive a car. Manual. Sagot ko ang gas. He's OK with it. Next off, maybe.

- Started reading The Firm by John Grisham.

- Had a long talk with Sky one night. Phone call.

- Watched Evan Almighty with Krissy at SM Megamall. Slept during the part when Evan was building the ark. Heh heh. Antok na'ko nun eh. Di pa ako umuuwi from work. Natulog ako sa eTel after ng 9-6 shift namin, then went to PRC to get my grade and apply for the oath-taking churva. Tapos nagyaya si Krissy na manood ng movie. Dumirecho ako sa Megamall. Had lunch. Tapos stroll sa mall. Gala gala gala. Then yun nga, nood ng sine... kaso tinulugan ko yung isang part ng movie... paggising ko, buo na yung ark. Hahahaha!!

Fitu Slidey is my Nokia 5200 phone... the one I bought last July 15. Huhu. Ninakaw siya last Saturday!! Grabe talaga. And so my Globe sim's lost too. What a tragedy... Now I'm using my Sun sim na lang. I bought a Nokia 1600 last Sunday for 2300 bucks lang sa SM Fairview... Yun muna ang gagamitin ko for a month I think. Mag-iipon ako for a new mobile phone. Sana N73... Sigh. (Farewell, Fitu!) :(

Today’s my birthday! I am now 22 years old! Yay me! Actually you should congratulate God for creating me AND putting up with me for 22 years! Haha. I have come to the final realization that I am indeed a brat. But I so appreciate the way He loves, protects, and disciplines me... Serves me right. Heh heh.

And here's the big bang! Good news! Reeaaally good news! I PASSED THE JUNE-2007 NURSES LICENSURE EXAMINATION! Wee* Hooray!

I just woke up. Yawns* Good morning, world!

Was I just dreaming or I really saw RJ when I first woke up at around 6 AM? Nagising kasi ako, then I saw him sleeping on the La-Z Boy beside mine. Hmm. I remember hearing my phone's "excuse me, boss, you have a text message" alert, and turning on my other side as I dozed off again. Maybe it's true, I did see him.

OK. I gotta go home. But before I go, here's a song I just remembered when I typed "home". This is one of my favorite songs right now... Well, actually, the words "going home" in this song has a different meaning to me. It's like I'm coming back to God to be embraced by Him at the end of a long and tiring day or after an exhausting/painful/sad experience. Those parts of the song that I really like are colored blue. Enjoy the lyrics. Buh-bye.

Home by Chris Daughtry

I'm staring out into the night
Trying to hide the pain.
I'm going to the place where
love and feeling good don't ever cost a thing,
And the pain you feel's a different kind of pain.

I'm going home,
Back to the place where I belong,
And where your love has always been enough for me.
I'm not running from.
No, I think you got me all wrong.
I don't regret this life I chose for me.
But these places and these faces are getting old
So I'm going home.
Well I'm going home.

The miles are getting longer, it seems,
The closer I get to you.
I've not always been the best man or friend for you.
But your love, remains true.
And I don't know why.
You always seem to give me another try.

So I'm going home,
Back to the place where I belong
And where your love has always been enough for me.
I'm not running from.
No, I think you got me all wrong.
I don't regret this life I chose for me.
But these places and these faces are getting old.

Be careful what you wish for,
'Cause you just might get it all.
You just might get it all,
And then some you don't want.
Be careful what you wish for,
'Cause you just might get it all.
You just might get it all, yeah.

Oh, well I'm going home,
Back to the place where I belong,
And where your love has always been enough for me.
I'm not running from.
No, I think you got me all wrong.
I don't regret this life I chose for me.
But these places and these faces are getting old.
I said these places and these faces are getting old.
So I'm going home.
I'm going home.

Hola! I haven't posted a blog yesterday. Sorry to my (according to Louie) very obsessed fan out there who might contemplate suicide after learning that I ended a day without posting a blog. Scary huh? Heh heh. Anyway, let's support my trainer's idea. Let's name that fan "Maf", as in My Avid Fan.

So let me catch you up on all my life's events since Wednesday night. To start with, I would like to say, ladies and gentlemen, na ang haba ng hair ng lola mo. Hahaha. Yeah. Believe that coz I've got three supporting statements here. First, mahaba naman talaga ang hair ko. I don't know the exact length from scalp to tip of course, but down from my clavicle (pardon the nurse's jargon), it's 7 to 8 inches long. Second, Ate Maudie told me last Sunday after the 2nd-service praise-and-worship that my hair's so long na. Well, we didn't see each other for like two months na kasi, at nagpa-rebond ako nung July 11 so parang mas humaba pa talaga ang hair ko after the treatment. For the third statement, well, this is more like a churva thingy lang.. Kasi last Wednesday night, I was conversing with these two guys thru text, and (guess what!) they ACTUALLY proposed to me. Imagine?! Magkasunod! Ang haba talaga ng hair ko. So there. By the way, one of them was Craven, and the other one is, well, let's name him "Sanjeev" na lang. I almost (ALMOST) gave my "yes" to Craven that night coz he was saying things that were so sweet and sincere. Buti na lang I was able to control my self and think clearly. (Imagine the tip of my index finger almost touching my thumb) I was this close to having a boyfriend that night! Oh my. Buti na lang Jay-Jay's with me that time. His presence alone prompted me to think think think, not just feel feel feel. But, come to think of it, something happened that time too.. I think a mutual understanding has been confirmed between Craven and I. ..Tsk. Anyway, I hope Craven will be the kind of guy I am expecting him to be. He calls me "honey or hon" for a time now even if we're not really a couple. That's so sweet of him. So, heck, let him be. On the other hand, Sanjeev also said that he loves me. Oh, por favor! Now that's something I didn't know how to react to. He's my friend/tropa/barkada/kaibigan for crying out loud!!!! Sigh. But I do like him, honestly. Now I'm confused. Sabagay naman, at least I didn't commit myself sa kahit isa sa kanila that night. My spiritual foundation is strong, thank goodness. Though my need for intimacy is too strong to be neglected sometimes, I'm still able to resist things that are not meant to happen this soon. (Victorious me!)

Now, this is the next spiritual battle I survived: I'm actually here now in the 29th-floor pantry of eTel Libis coz sa lounge ulit ako matutulog ngayon. Kagagaling ko lang sa "Brown Paper Bag". It's a place where people drink and smoke, and basically have their kind of fun. I went there with 9 of my eTel buddies (5 girls and 4 guys) after our training class. Uminom ba'ko? No. Nagyosi ba'ko? No. Nakakatawa man pero sumama ako sa kanila and I didn't drink nor smoke. I just drank one 12-oz. bottle of Royal, ate the "pulutan", danced a bit, and had fun with them! See? I can now do that. Kung may nakakaalam kung sino ako nung high school at nung nasa PUP pa'ko, they might have a hard time believing that I didn't take even a drop of alcoholic drink nor take a pull from a stick this particular evening. I was seating beside "M", this guy wavemate of mine, who kept offering me his glass and cigarette. But, thank God, I was able to say NO all the time. At buti na lang "P" was like protecting me coz I told her that I don't drink. Pinapatigil nya yung guys sa pag-aalok sa'kin ng beer. Sobrang gustong gusto ko na rin sanang uminom kahit isang lagok lang ng San Mig Light, Strong Ice, or Red Horse... I was even tempted to smoke. But for the nth time, thank You Lord! Because na-control ko ang sarili ko. Really, the old has gone -- the new has come. God knows how hard the battle was kanina sa Brown Paper Bag. I spent my teenage years celebrating things with liquors, slim handheld chimneys, et cetera. When He found me two years ago, I was like a rebel. But then He changed my life completely and loved me unconditionally. I gave up every twisted principle and angst when He asked me to surrender my life. Now I'm free from the things of this world. I found out that there's more to life than high grades, cool friends, popularity, being "in", and so on. So habang nag-iinuman sila kanina, tamang kwento lang ako at deliver ng punchlines. Tamang sayaw kami on our seats at tamang kanta ng rock songs. We had fun! Nag-enjoy kami. A photographer from the Pulp mag even took our picture. Haha. He said they'll feature the place daw kasi sa mag nila kaya nandun yung group nila, taking pictures and interviewing the manager. Hmm. Ma-publish kaya pati picture namin? Anyway, we'll receive our first salary na next week... Sana may gimik ulit kami. Pero sana dinner naman. =) Winks*

Yesterday morning, I received a text message from a friend. The content didn't surprise me because it's like I've known it long before. But deep inside, I was hoping that this thing won't be confirmed. Well, now it is. Sigh. I don't know what to say. I feel happy for this friend of mine. But honestly, something tells me that it shoudn't be that way. That something's not quite right. Maybe I'm just being too concerned. Maybe I'm just over-reacting in my mind. I tried tearing myself out of that thought but it bugged me. I hope things will turn out good for my friend. Anyway, all I can do is to give my support all the way and pray.

Anyway, on to lighter topics, I found out that Keesha has a Friendster account. (What the?!) Y'know, she is just two years old. My cute inaanak. Heck, I know her mom made it of course. But I was amazed when I saw her webpage. Cutie. Aww.. I just realized, I miss my best friends... Sniff* Yeah, I have a handful of best buds, not just Sky (but he's the only male bestfriend I got). I have two childhood best friends - Michelle and Kristine (Keesha's mom). We went to the same school (FHLA) from elementary to high school, and we've known each other since the 5th grade. 'Hope I'll see them soon. FYI: I've got, uhm, 5 best friends. Jay-Jay included.

Oh. I'm so looking forward to Sunday! I'm planning to attend the Sunday service. And, guess what? I'll have drums lessons with Fritz! Yippee! It's been, what?, SIX years since I had my last drums lesson with Invictus, my CAT co-officer in high school. He taught me the basics. Now with Fritz I can now learn more beats and techniques since I've already learned the fundamentals. I love drums. It's always the drum beat (if not the lyrics) that fascinates me in a song. The loud crash, snare strikes, and bambambams. Oh, the time.. gotta go! Gimme a rock beat as I leave, will you please. Thanks.

Fifth monthsary namin ngayon ni Sky (my guy bestfriend). He sent me a message around midnight to greet me, and he asked for his bonnet. Did I promise that I'll give him a bonnet? Can't remember. All I know is we'll watch a movie together this month and that he promised that we will dine out in a nice resto. Hmm... Bonnet... I really can't remember. But if he wants one, I may probably buy him one.

Change topic. This guy I've known for a long time now has FINALLY told me that he likes me. Blush* Now he's courting me! (Waah.) Well, he's nice naman. (Let's name him "Craven"). He's from a diff school of nursing. Yeah, I kinda like him too. The thing is, we don't share the same faith. He's got a diff relig.. And he's in Cebu right now and he probably won't be in Manila muna for the next couple couple couple of months. Sigh. Well, I give it all to God. (Lord, teach me what to do.) I don't wanna go for things that may end up devastating, painful or, worse, a factor that will separate me from my spiritual fortress. Since I started working, I keep reminding myself of this verse: "Guard the good deposit that was entrusted to you - guard it with the help of the Holy Spirit who lives in us." That's so I am able to block the things of this world that are trying to get to me, like smoking, liquors, bad-mouthing, rebellion et cetera. Having God as my guardian is, well, my unbeatable defense.. unless I stray away. God help me then, coz I don't want to.

Change topic. Last night, Peaches (team leader) and RJ (SME) treated us to Yellow Cab. Well, it's sort of a get-together coz RJ will be teaching another team starting today. That's sad. Hope we'll still see him around.

Change topic. Louie (trainer) hasn't given me my Snickers bar yet. He owe me that coz it's my prize. Last Fri, I was the first one who found this certain article he asked us to search for in the net. Heheh. Oh, by the way, guess what? My mates call me a hacker. They also gave me the name "Trinity" (the gorgeous -ehem- hacker chick in the Matrix film). Actually if you'll ask me, geek's a great word to describe me now, and I seriously couldn't care less about my old opinions on being called a geek (though nobody calls me that naman, ako lang ang nag-isip). As a TSR, I'm into computers, softwares, hardwares, connections, troubleshooting and other tech thingy. You may not believe it, but I do enjoy these stuff right now. Love 'em, really.

What else? Hmm. Guess that's it. Vavoosh for now.

I just woke up from my first deep slumber in the eTel lounge. Yeah, I slept there after our training class last night. T'was raining and I had to go home to Bulacan. But I didn't wanna go through the hassles of rain plus long bus ride plus city darkness. Shivers*
But, as I can see here thru the window (I'm in the 21st floor pantry), it's still raining! Goodness. Pero uuwi na'ko. Gusto ko na maligo. Gusto ko na magpalit ng damit. Mashado na kaming close sa isa't isa ng jacket ko. By the way, I'm wearing my new eTel jacket... It's black (my favorite color)... It has an inner pocket, two side pockets (where I could keep my hands when they're cold), and it looks great. I love it. This is currently my favorite thing in the world. Wala lang. Share ko lang. =P
Well, I hope today will be a good day for me, rest wise.
Gotta go. Welcome world! It's Saturday!

Hey, last note: I really enjoy my job. The company I work for is fab!

For my best friend, Jay-Jay:
Things just haven’t been the same since we’ve become close. I was just a kid when you were introduced to me and I never thought that you’d be my best friend.
In grade school, I only talked to you during recess and at night. You’re my childhood friend, but how come you never really played with me? In high school, new kids became my friends and we almost lost our connection.
But now I’m glad because, though I've got so many friends and you have a multitude too, our old friendship was rekindled in college. The bond we have is stronger now. We talk everyday, and share each other’s lives. You always make me smile.
Today, August 16, we celebrate our anniversary. I just wanted you to know that I appreciate your presence in my life, Jay-Jay. How could I carry on without your funny (ironic) surprises and words of encouragement? How could I make the best decision without asking for your opinion? I couldn’t even go to a certain place anymore without first informing you and asking you to come with me. Really, I changed a lot because of you. I’m happier. Thank you so much, Jay! I’m thrilled to gaze into that future when we will live together in one place.
I love you, best friend! Muah.

I arrived early today. Yes, like yesterday. Our training starts at 1pm, and here I am now enjoying the gameroom. Thanks to the shuttles from Marikina to Makati. Forty five bucks really isn't bad if you wanna avoid the hassles of getting to Cubao first to take the MRT going to Buendia, then take a seven-peso jeepney ride to RCBC, and walk some distance to PBcom Tower. Pwede pa'ko mag-emote-emote sa van while listening to my mp3. Sa MRT, hay naku, what are the chances na makaupo ako? Baka sumabit pa yung headset ko sa zippers ng bags or elbows ng ibang pasahero. Medyo gitgitan kasi. Heheh.

Well anyway, August na.. Lapit na birthday ko. (wee*) I'm turning 22 on the 28th. And here's another important day: on the 16th, spiritual birthday ko naman. Yaay! I so love being in the presence of my Lord and Savior. (I love You!!)

Okay. Today we finally had the TIME to dicover where the gameroom of eTel's Makati site is. It's in the 16th floor! And right now I'm actually here browsing the web for free while J.B. and Xavier are playing air hockey... (Guys, you're so noisy!)

Anyway, I saw Ms. Pauline in the twelfth floor today. She's my favorite HR gal in Libis. We talked for a couple of minutes... She told me she'll be here in Makati for the next two weeks. That's nice. Oh, I saw Russ too.

Our trainer yesterday was MJ. A very bubbly guy. Then today we have Lisa. I like the way she talks. Always makes sense.

I was transferred to Shaw with 6 of my former co-trainees in Tech PET. Start na ng 6-month training namin yesterday (7am-4pm). Yeah, we passed that 5-day training. Thank God. Though under construction pa yung most part of that one-hectare site, maganda na yung place. First, folks, the pantry is sooo spacious. I think you can put a whole badminton court inside. Then, there's the Female Lounge. I love it. And, eherm, our Brazilian instructor is cute. Heheh. Hay...

Hay, si Lord... Minsan, I don't get it why He wants all of me for Himself. Minsan, pag may time na parang super at peace na'ko sa buhay because of the security I get from having something or someone, before I knew it, that would be totally turned upside down. Malulungkot ako 'coz I lost a source of my happiness. Then I'd realize, mali pala kasi ang ginawa ko. Nawala yung focus ko kay God. Hindi na sha ang strong point ko. What would happen was, he would take what I have and let me experience pain (siguro) para maisip ko na nanjan Siya and I don't really need anything or anyone from this world to be happy. Tulad kanina... I felt sad. It's like something is starting to unravel. It's this relationship I have with someone. A dear friend. When a friendship ends pa naman, it can be more painful than ending a romantic relationship. So nasasaktan talaga ako. Ngayon, 'di ko pa alam kung ano ang gagawin ko. Is it really ending? Do I have to prevent it from ending? God. This is really heartbreaking. (What are you trying to teach me, Lord?)

Been a long time now since I last posted a blog here. Well, this time around we find ME outside the school. Yeah, no more campus diaries. I've already graduated last April. Even took the Nurses Licensure Examination last June. I became a complete home bum after that for two weeks. Watched all those Jumong DVDs I borrowed from Mark and finished all that fictions I bought during my toxic days in college (even though I was aware that I won't have enough time to read 'em). Tsk. Absurd.
Anyway, fast forward to TODAY O'CLOCK, I'm now a Tech PET trainee in eTelecare Global Solutions, a probie being groomed to become a Technical Support Representative. My training started last Monday, July 23. That's 1 to 10 in the evening, Monday to Friday, at CyberOne, Eastwood City, Libis. Grabeh. I so love the place. I love the sessions. And guess what? Now I know how to play Table Football! That's also called Foosball or Foozeball. Remember that table game the lead characters in "Friends" always play? Yun yon. Heheh.
Some of my co-trainees and I always play that in the gameroom during breaks, while the others would play chess, playstation or table tennis, or just surf the net.
We're only eight in our batch.. Me, Jaz, Ruth, Xavier, Bleng Bleng, Ace, B,and Russ. Cool names huh? Yeah. And jokingly we call ourselves "the Jolly Team".. haha. Masaya kc kami. Kachika rin namin yung instructor namin, who is a good joker himself.
Ooops. It's almost 1pm. Gotta go to 3102. Ta ta.

Sachi is a Japanese name which means joyful or blessed.
Kalea can be traced to a Hawaiian word, "kaleo", which means sound.
So SACHI KALEA means 'joyful sound' or 'blessed sound'.
That's the name I gave my guitar... a precious (21st-) birthday gift from my dear college friends. (Love y'all. Thanks very much!)

And I'm back in the classroom! Should I get excited or what? Last night, I told Schmoe that I might not attend our class today in NCM205. Well, I thought maybe our professor would not start teaching on our first day... and it'd be a total waste of time to come to class. But then I have a meeting with the feature editor today at 12, and I need to see Sir Aldo (our former C.I. in the O.R.) at 2 ... So I thought, well, why not attend our class in the morning? Sigh* This is my first week in school for this year... and I'm already so busy. Meeting everyday... gotta talk to him... to her... gotta do this and that. Gotta go there and get this and that. Hmm... I could use a planner. Right. I'm going to buy one. My cellphone's to-do list and calendar aren't enough for me. Yes, I should get one. Heh heh. Ta ta.

Yuletide is over. Oh, here's a super late greeting: Merry Christmas everyone! And just in time, HAPPY NEW YEAR!
I'll be walking the hospital corridors again in two days. (Group 11-B... Guyz, get ready. Uhm, how do you go to Mary Johnston again? Heh heh. Sabay tayo, Yuanne. Seeya at the LRT.)
So far I haven't been going out much unlike last year's Christmas vacation, when my high shool friends and I would often see each other, attend someone's party, or just hang out somewhere. Last December 23, the FHLA-CAT officers batch 2001-2002 were supposed to have a Christmas reunion at Gege's place. Days before that, Piede and I were texting each other. I told the charming (cough*) former 1st battalion commander that I might not be able to come because of my duty in the O.R. from 6 morn to 6 eve. But then our RLE group was informed that no surgery was scheduled for the coming Saturday, and Sir Bong -our C.I.- advised us not to come anymore. So we didn't. Sigh. How sad. I so love being in the O.R... wearing my white scrub suit... watching/assisting in a surgery... smelling the stern cleanliness of the O.R. complex. Awesome.
Anyway, so then I had the chance to see my old comrades. But a couple of hours before the evening affair, I received 2 text messages from Piede saying that the whole thing was cancelled. Hm. Ok. Reasons were valid. No problemo.
So as I was saying, I haven't been going outdoors since my last duty, er, since I went to the Riverpark with Ianne last December 22. That's my last major stroll with a friend. Of course my family would go out sometimes... eat lunch... shop... stroll at the mall... But y'know what I'd do? After eating or buying my stuff, I'd go home right away. Haha. For a few hours, I'd have the whole house for myself... till there goes the sound of our gate being opened.
Well, staying at home is fun actually. I wouldn't wish to be somewhere else. Why would I when I get to watch the whole season 1 of Grey's Anatomy and the whole season 4 of CSI? The DVDs were just there neatly stacked in front of the couch.
So there. I watched them all with bro. My favorite character in GA is Izzie Stevens. She's so smart and pretty. And Greg, the young DNA expert in CSI, is kinda cute, isn't he? Blush* Well, Meredith Grey (the lead character in GA) and Gil Grissom (the head investigator in CSI) became my "friends" during the holidays. Ha ha. Go, couch potato!